Alone Together: Navigating Loneliness in Relationships

Being in a relationship is often associated with feelings of companionship and emotional connection. However, loneliness can still creep into a relationship, making it a complex and distressing experience. In this blog article, we will explore the reasons behind loneliness in relationships and its impact on both partners’ mental health.

Read on to learn why this happens, as well as some practical solutions that you can employ to improve and strengthen the bond between you and your partner, fostering a deeper and more fulfilling connection.

Why do we experience loneliness in relationships?

Differing Needs/Mismatched Expectations

  • When the couple has different ideas on what they want to get out of the relationship, or what they expect from each other, it can lead to conflicts and subsequent estrangement, contributing to a sense of loneliness.

Lifestyle Changes/Busyness

  • Couples may be too preoccupied with their daily activities, such as work, household chores etc, that they end up neglecting their partner.

  • Sudden changes in lifestyle may also upset the status quo in the relationship. For example, a change of jobs may require them to move to a new and unfamiliar location, and perhaps also to sacrifice couple time.

The party that moved for the sake of his/her partner may experience isolation and loneliness, and friction and discontentment may result if he/she does not receive enough support from his/her partner.

Lack of Shared Interests

  • Couples usually bond over shared interests and hobbies. This allows them to bond through spending quality time together.  A lack of similar interests could result in the couple drifting apart, and contribute to loneliness in both parties.


Unresolved Conflicts

  • Minor conflicts that are not settled early can snowball into larger issues that are harder to resolve over time. Couples who constantly hold grudges, or are keeping score over previous slights and faults, can find themselves feeling increasingly emotionally distant from their partner.

Impact of loneliness in relationships


Extended periods of unresolved conflict, unmeaningful time spent together and a lack of emotional support can place undue stress on either/both parties. These can then lead to either/both parties developing mental health issues such as  anxiety and depression in the long run.

How to improve the relationship?

Communication/Emotional Support

  • We all know that communication is key to maintaining any relationship. It is important to speak openly with your partner regarding your expectations, the lack of support received, and the sense of loneliness you feel within the relationship. Don’t hold back on giving words of encouragement when your partner is feeling down, and be generous when expressing your gratitude to your partner for supporting you. Effective communication can bring both parties closer together.


  • Communication is not limited to words, but can also involve doing things for each other. If you know that your partner is exhausted from his/her work, you can help him/her out by doing his/her share of the chores or helping to take care of the children. 

Being Attentive to Your Partner’s Needs

  • Schedule time together to do activities both you and your partner are interested in. Alternatively, show your partner you are willing to step out of your comfort zone and try out his/her hobbies. Not only will you gain a new experience, but this fosters a deeper connection and bonds the couple closer together. 


  • Planning surprises also help to spice up your relationship. Consider surprising your partner with a meaningful and thoughtful gift. For example, if your partner loves to travel, you can plan a vacation getaway for the two of you to enjoy.

Seeking Professional Help

  • If, despite your best efforts, the sense of loneliness and estrangement persists,  consider seeking marital or couples therapy to help you uncover, address, resolve and even recover from any underlying issues that may be affecting your relationship under the guidance of a professional.


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